Monday, January 30, 2012
DONT JUST EXIST- LIVE!!!!!!!!!!
Change is a constant factor in mine. Stagnation scares the shiz outta me. Not kidding. I always wanna be on the move, experience new things, see new sights, feel new feelings. I’m restless. That’s me.
Have you ever wanted to pack your bag, go somewhere new, become a hippie, breathe raw scents of nature that will fill your heart and your soul and that moment will always be captured in your memory forever, to be looked into as your secret cuz no one else knows how you felt that moment? Or perhaps those who were with you know. The joy. The oneness. The happiness. The fulfillment.
But life isn’t a movie. It goes on. That’s the bad part about it sometimes. That perfect moments cannot last forever. Cuz life moves on, there will be ups and there will be downs. But those precious memories will always be ours to claim.
One of my many favorite flashbacks of life comes back to me at weird times. It was climbing up and going down the hills of AL HAIR. They have hot water springs there. The place was so peaceful. And of course I was with someone – we held hands, talked, laughed and contemplated life as we went. We were happy. Pure unadulterated joy. I even remember there was café called “Big Fish” and it’s was written in the shape of a fish. I lost my camera and I have nothing of those 12 days - but those memories I hold very close. I lived those days.
What I’m trying to say is, such things are etched with such clarity in our minds. Now 3 years later, amidst the hustle bustle of life, the fast pace, ringing blackberries, urgent demands, when these moments come back to me suddenly, I’m filled with a sense of calm and a tiny smile never fails to touch my lips.
I have many such prized memories. Thank Allah for giving me a wonderful if not perfect life. The moments without a care in the world, those are my favorites.
But I say life moves on. Someday I wanna be a hippie. The other days I wanna be Paris Hilton. My love for materialistic things is so great. I got a wardrobe full of clothes I haven’t worn, accessories I haven’t touched, makeup I haven’t opened, shoes I never wore – but I keep buying more of everything all the time. While travelling is my joy, shopping is my addiction – my drug. I want more, more and more out of life.
Which explains why perhaps I’m so disappointed and down. Cuz expectations are so high. We expect more from ourselves, from people around us, from loved ones, from our jobs, from our children. In that process of beating ourselves and everyone else at the rat race, we lose ourselves. We cease to be that happy soul in that perfect moment – the real us which is why our loved ones love us. Materialism makes us unhappy and chronic unhappiness makes us monsters – difficult to live and be with.
So take your time out from your busy lives for some time every day and revisit those places you were the happiest at. Revisit those people whether or not they’re in your life, revisit them in your memories who made you the happiest. Relive those memories. Feel those feelings and fill your heart & mind with joy and let that tiny smile creep onto your lips. Take time out everyday every week to do things that me you happy. Paint, sing, read, be silly, love, pray, capture your own heart.
As for me, my mind is already in EGYPT, in Wadi Al Madha, in the nightclubs Zinc & Venom, Muscat, KERELA, Jaipur, MALDIVES Island, spotting a tornado, the first time I bought 5 shoes at once, a picturesque place we discovered when we were lost and many more…
Don't merely exist. Live your life.
"Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance"